Letters

Jonah, you are turning into a stereotypical little boy.  It's funny how in the past week or so you've gained a scab from some kind of scrape on your tummy, scabs from skinning your knees and palms, got a bee sting, and started pre-school.

Pre-school!  Oh heavens, you're growing up.  Over the past couple years I've heard people talking and read blogs about parents sending their first kid off to kindergarten or first grade, and how it's all emotional to see their kid so grown up.  I always just passed it off as over-emotional mommies that lack proper perspective on kids and their development (and yes, I have a mighty high horse).  But seeing you go out the door to walk to pre-school with your mama changed MY perspective.  And no, I'm still not gushy and teary-eyed like some people, but it's still a big impact on me.  You're my little boy. 

I think pre-school is going to be a very good thing for you.  You're somewhat of an anti-social creature.  You stand on the sidelines and watch other kids play.  You don't participate very much in pre-school yet.  Just the other day you brought home a sheet of green construction paper with one little white streak on it.  I asked you what the kids did at preschool that day, and you said, "They painted, but I just played with the green ball."  The mothers that have hosted the pre-school so far say that you generally participate in snack time and that's about it.  I really hope this isn't a lasting thing. 

You have developed some pretty good emotional control lately.  Love and Logic really does work!  The big milestone marker was a few days ago when Mama was giving you a haircut.  You HATE haircuts, and generally scream through the whole thing.  So, Mama's cutting your hair and I'm standing in front of you to try to help keep you a little calmer and maybe help you not wiggle so much, and to give Mama some moral support.  You were screaming something to me, and were so freaked out that I really couldn't understand what you were saying.  I told you I couldn't understand, and you immediately stopped screaming and very emotionally, but very clearly, said, "Daddy, I need a tissue."  And when I got you a tissue and wiped your nose, you didn't scream any more.  That's some serious control, kiddo.  I am still very impressed. 

You still like to throw small tantrums though.  But lately they've taken the general form of:

"I want some chips, Daddy."

"No."

"I WANT SOME CHIPS"

"Does it help to yell?"

"....grumble, grumble, grumble...."

I think you're finally learning that there are limits, and they generally don't move for all your protestations.  And you're learning that asking for something with a "Please?" generally goes over a lot better than yelling. 

You love balls, trucks, trains, pizza, running around, and Ochre.  Does it get any more boyish than that?  You tell me to hold my arms out in a circle, making a "basket hoop" so you can throw your basketball through.  You have enough coordination to play a pretty good game of catch.  I've never really seen a 3-year-old that can do that.  What will I do if you grow up with coordination and a hankering to play sports?  I think I can help you in a general sense when you're still little, but beyond that you're out of my realm of experience.  I've never had real coordination.  I guess if sports is something you really take to, we'll figure it out.

We're very near the end of the yard projects, finally!  We have a guy scheduled to come spray hydroseed tomorrow evening.  Then we can just "sit back and watch the grass grow," so to speak.  Your Mama and I have lots of things in mind for all the extra time we think we'll have.  Most of that involves restoring your Mama's sanity, which has been steadily sapped away starting with our move right before you were born.  She's slowly been worn down more and more these past three years, and now it's time to put significant effort into fixing that.  Your Mama has put up with a lot.  She definitely needs a break.  So I think the routine for the next couple weeks will be Daddy comes home from work and Mama disappears to do her own thing.  Or we go to some activity as a family.  Your parents are looking forward to this slower pace with desperate eyes right now. 

Jonah, I get frustrated with you a lot, as I'm sure any father of a 3-year-old would do.  But you really are such a good kid.  You behave pretty well, you obey well, and you're starting to make right choices because YOU want to.  I'm so glad for that.  I don't want to be a dictator in your life.  I want you to be able to think for yourself, and choose good things as a result of that thinking.  I feel so inadequate as a parent, and I would be very worried if you were too dependent on me.  I want you to be able to stand on your own two feet and take on the world.  You certainly have the potential. 

I love you, kiddo. 

Love,

Daddy

Dear Precious Little Girl,

I can't believe you're already a year old.  It is so amazing to me how much you've grown up in so short a time.  Mama took you to the neighbor's house for a haircut this month, and you are SO DARN CUTE.  You look all grown up.  You're very close to walking.  You'll stand up with your hippo toy and walk with just one hand pushing it.  And, drum roll please, your top teeth are coming in! 

We're not sure if you're just getting your two front teeth, or if the pair just outside that are coming in at the same time.  There seem to be white bumps there, as well as your front teeth that have broken through.  But you give us ample opportunity to look and guess.  Your favorite expression is a super-cheesy wide grin that would show off SO many teeth, if you had them.  

You're figuring out this whole communication thing lately.  I can ask you, "Sophie, can you clap?" and you'll start clapping, with that same cheesy grin.  You've figured out how to chase me, and what it means when I'm chasing you.  You're just like Jonah was, with your shrieks and giggles as you crawl down the hall away from me.  And when you want something you can't reach, you'll crawl over to it, reach out your arm, and look back over your shoulder at me, so plainly asking for help it's almost comical.

And we've finally reached that stage where you think your brother is pretty neat.  You watch him a lot, and copy him often.  We put you both in the red double jogger stroller and go for walks, which usually means Jonah sticks his thumb in his mouth.  You'll look over at him, and I can just see your brain going, "Oh, is that what we're doing?  OK,"  and you'll put your thumb in too.  And a couple seconds later you'll look over at him again, just to make sure he's not yanking your chain.

We tried to go camping this weekend on Antelope Island.  The Balloon Festival is held there every year about this time.  We thought it'd be a grand adventure to go out and watch hot air balloons float up into the sky.  Well, when we got there, it was very windy, and they couldn't light up any balloons for fear of crashing into the vendor booths, or if it did get far enough off the ground, it probably would have blown into the Salt Lake airport flight path.  Not a good choice.  We found this out from an information booth near the entrance of the Balloon Festival grounds.  The grounds were not far from our campsite, and when we returned we saw our tent sitting there like the top third had collapsed downward.  Turns out the wind was so strong it almost flattened our tent.  But we pushed it back into shape and managed to finally get you and Jonah asleep.  I didn't get much sleep, because every time I really got comfortable the wind would pick up and I would get whacked in the head with a tent pole as the tent tried to collapse again.  After some hours like this, the wind started to really pick up and it rained just a bit.  You woke up and were very nervous about the wind noises.  You would crawl over to me, snuggle with me for a few seconds (such precious seconds!), and then you'd want to get down so you could crawl over to Mama and snuggle with her.  Then you'd want to crawl back to me again.  You went back and forth several times, poor little frightened girl.  I wanted so badly to just hold you and protect you from all the wind and noise and frightening stuff going on.  Ochre was needing comfort too.  She was pretty good to stay in her end of the tent for the most part, but when things started getting worse she poked her nose around the partition and eventually came in for some comfort.  Your Mama and I were standing up both holding the tent up, and thinking that since Jonah was still asleep we'd sit it out and see if things calmed down.  But then Jonah woke up too, so we decided to pack up and go home.  A very kind couple was walking through the campground and offered to help us pack up.  So we were quickly on our way home, where you, Jonah and Ochre were all very relieved to be in familiar beds.  Your Mama and I were also glad to be home.  It was an eventful night. 

A lot of people say little girls have totally different temperaments than little boys, and I agree.  You are much more cuddly, and have the cutest little girl expressions and mannerisms.  Just like Jonah taking to trucks, trains and balls without anyone needing to teach him "Boy" activities, you seem to not need any direction in finding your own girlish ways.  You will be an interesting influence to watch in our family. 

I love you more than ever, sweetie.  You look a lot like your mother, and that definitely helps, as I'm crazy in love with her.  Being able to interact with you more and more has such an incredible pull on my heart.  I cherish my relationship with you, and I love coming home to your sweet little grin and shrieks.  I'm looking forward to this coming year, where you will learn to walk, talk some (we hope) and generally learn a ton.  It's so fun to watch you grow up.  I love you.

Love,

Daddy